Monday, September 19, 2011

Guess Who Said...

"Why are you packing that blanket?"
"They will charge us for it even if we don't take it. They expect us to. "
"This is a hospital not a Holiday Inn, you clepto!"


"Dear Lord, Please let this kid poop soon, and let me not be the one to find it.  Thanks. Amen"


"No, her Dad owns a farm.  She learned early how to work the hoes."
"Think about what you just said."
Blank Look
"So, you're saying your boss used to be a pimp...on a farm.  So that makes you a....."



After a doc asked a whole bunch of complicated questions from someone who couldn't talk.
"Even us dumb firefighters know to ask yes or no questions of a barely responsive person.  Guess they don't teach common sense in med school."


"I'm sorry, but we are not nicknaming our kid, Rehab."
"How about Detox?"
"WTH?!"
"What, just trying to give them realistic expectations."
"How about if you call the girls anything like that I call you, Bobbit....how's that for a realistic expectation?"

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