Being married to a firefighter can present some unique marital challenges.
I'm not talking about the usual challenges associated with the lifestyle. Like dealing with unexpected calamities by yourself, constantly being broke, the long hours alone, the missed special events or the sudden overtime that messes up your plans. Firefighter spouses expect all of these.
What I'm talking about is fighting. Good old fashioned, once in a while, get it off your chest and clear the air kind of arguing.
I'm not, by any means, advocating taking up fighting as your primary form of communication, but sometimes sugar coating it just doesn't get the point across. Do you know what I mean?
But what do you do when your FF's on duty or getting ready to go, and he just really pissed you off?
If you're like me, the vast majority of the time you swallow it. Why?
While I may not constantly dwell on or even actively think about the fact that it could be the last time I see him, it's always in the back of my mind. So, I made a promise to myself to never argue with him while he's on duty or right before he leaves for work. Because I know I would regret it for the rest of my life if my last words to him were something like, "Hey, snot launcher, you forgot to take out the trash. Again. Whada I have to do, tattoo it to your forehead?"
Well maybe that isn't the serious kind of example I'm talking about, but you get my drift.
In some ways, having to "wait" to argue is a good thing. It makes me stop and think about what I'm really mad about and do I really want to raise hell over whatever it may be. Sometimes, the answer is yes, but most of the time the answer is no. Sometimes, he's pissed me off so bad, I break my promise to myself and go kamikaze on his ass.
I'm not perfect. Shocker, I know. Besides, a little crazy never hurt anyone.
So, here's my shout out to other firewives. What do you do?