Wednesday, March 28, 2012

To Share or Not To Share

I know this is gonna be a big news flash to y'all, but really little kids don't know shit.  Don't get it twisted, yo.  I'm not hating on the mini mes of the world.  If you're 3 and you don't know shit, that's a-OK.  In fact, it's expected.  If you're 30 and don't know shit, well, you got a big problem.

What I'm getting at, is that it's ridiculous when we expect our children to be mini adults.

Case and point:  Sharing.

It's absolutely ludicrous to try to tell a toddler or young preschooler, "no no, that's not yours" or "you need to share."  Mostly, because I'm pretty sure, to them, it sounds like, "no no, blah blah blah" or "you need to e=mc2" and makes about as much sense.

And I'm completely guilty of this.

Since The Bun has become mostly mobile as of late, Miss Chatterbox has been going all jealous alpha female on her ass, yanking every single stinking toy out of her hands.  It's been driving me crazy.  Like pulling my hair out crazy, except I don't have to pull it out myself since The Bun has been doing a great job giving me male pattern baldness.  I'm about thisclose to pulling a Britney and shaving it all off.  The Firefighter may not like it, but I could totally rock a Demi Moore (ala GI Jane minus the crazy rehab stint).  


After a solid week of talking/hollering/demonstrating/reading about sharing, it dawned on me.  I was making Miss Chatterbox feel bad about something she has no frame of reference for.  I decided to make it a non issue because I don't want to be the hovering parent stuck refereeing her kids.  I want them to be able work it out themselves.  I want my children to intrinsically want to be kind to their siblings, not kind because they are forced to be.  If I force them to share now, will I be setting the stage for resentment later?

Yeah, I know, I'm probably over thinking it - down side to being an only child raising sibling.  But I'm totally rooting for The Bun.  One of these days, she's gonna haul off and get even with her sister....and I probably won't intervene...


What's your solution for jealous/sharing issues?

Hope you have a humptacular Wednsday, folks!

1 comment:

  1. That's a tough one. FireGirl (3.5 yrs old) is really good at sharing... outside of the home. In our house, everything is "hers". Period. She even tries to lay claim to some of my things.

    I was reading recently that age 3 is when they REALLY start grasping concepts like "mine", "yours", "ours", etc and that they tend to latch onto those ideas & go a little haywire as they figure out their boundaries in those regards. By age 4 they should really "get it".

    I know, I know... you were hoping for a solution. Sorry, but that's the best I got. I'm sure you'll figure it out. Us moms always do :)