|Disclaimer - The nipples aren't real.|
Meet The Firefighter, the environmentally sensitive patriarch of the Horn Clan. If there is a grass, pine, weed, tree, or flower pollen within 50 miles, his abnormally large honker will know about it. He can be recognized by his ever-present sniffling and impressive loogie hocking ability. He is allergic to pet dander, smoke, peanuts, and is lactose intolerant as well. He is also an Aquarius who lives for his high rolling, hillbilly Cadillac, wrestling with his kids and annoying his wife with his endless supply of corny jokes.
Meet Miss Chatterbox, the vivacious and precocious eldest of the Horn sisters. She is a severe asthmatic whose triggers include pet dander, strong artificial fragrances and a bleepin' unknown that is pissing her momma bear off. She is severely allergic to strawberries and red dyes #3, #27, #40. She is also a free spirited and adventurous Capricorn with an infectious laugh who loves to draw on any blank surface and teach her little sister to crawl.
Meet The Bun, the mellow and happy-go-lucky middle Horn sister. This formerly allergy free member of the clan, now has the most encompassing allergy of them all - eggs. Which scares the piss out of her parents. She also has a suspect casein allergy awaiting tests results for confirmation. She is a Virgo who adores singing, drooling, crawling after Miss Chatterbox and rolling over toes in her walker.
And introducing, for the first time on the blog, The Jellybean. The youngest, as of yet unborn, of the Horn sisters, she has some big shoes to fill. No known allergies at this time, but I'm sure she won't disappoint. She is suspected to be a Leo and a thumb sucker and predicted to be a great dancer, as she already finds great joy in tap dancing on mommy bladder at midnight.
So there you have it, Folks. Throw in a dollop of romance and a pinch of tragedy and we have all the makings for this dramatic comedy we call life.